STOP IT NOW!
A little self-criticism is a good thing. It can be a reality check that encourages you to be a better person. But there is a big difference between saying ” I need to exercise more” which can be the seed planted to motivate you to workout, rather than to say to yourself, “I AM FAT!”
Sometimes excessive self-talk can backfire because it can cause us to focus on our failures instead of how we can improve ourselves. And over time, negative self-talk causes higher stress levels which can also lead to depression.
Studies show that the average person criticizes themselves at least eight times a day, starting as early as 8 AM. And Criticisms about the way we look by far are the most common (i.e. “Another bad hair day”, “These jeans make my butt look fat”)
Would you ever say the negative things you say to yourself to someone you love? Your spouse or child, a friend or family member? Probably not. But saying them to yourself is worse.
Thoughts create a vibrational energy. When you indulge in negative self-talk, you exude an energy that tells people you don’t like yourself. You may not say it out loud, but others sense it. And if you have kids in your life, giving off this vibration is teaching them that it’s okay to think poorly of themselves. This bad energy also tells people around you how you want to be treated.
So how do you stop the negative self-talk and create a more positive view of yourself? It’s not as hard as you may think.
First, it’s important to recognize when you’re doing it. When you hear yourself having a negative thought, just pause for a moment and ask yourself “is that true?” Start to notice when and why you are putting yourself down. You may find that there are situations that trigger these thoughts for you.
Second, practice gratitude for yourself and your body by noticing what’s right instead of what’s wrong. Energy flows where attention goes so shift your thoughts towards your positive characteristics, and you will start to see more of them.
Third, let go of perfection. Stop comparing yourself to everyone around you. You are beautiful just the way you are. You are only human and, just like everyone else, you will make mistakes and have faults. But don’t let them define you. Learn from them and move on.
Above all, remember that we are all human, and none of us are perfect. We accept imperfections in our loved ones; we also need to accept them in ourselves with a little empathy.